Following numerous complaints regarding the policy on extension cords in dormitories, the
principal president of Audacity College (Rockettopia's
greatest institute of higher learning) established a review board to compile, clarify, and rewrite the extension cord policies. Although the freshmen arrived
only yesterday and classes have yet to start, the change is already overdue. According to one freshman we interviewed, "The rules are too damn complected. Our RA
told us that extension cords were allowed only with surge protectors, the staff told us no extension cords at all, the oracle told me that extension cords are the work
of Ba'al the soul-eater and must be purged from the earth, and that guy over at Sigma Alpha Epsilon told me that I could have an extension cord only if I did
engaged in an obscene activity with him and some of his buddies. Those are some seriously mixed messages."
Although the board only began their work today, they have already been making headlines. The issue of chain power strips, which are allowed according to the RAs and the campus guide but banned by the head of CPS is still not resolved, In addition, the Rockettopia Society for Public Morality has kept the decades-old town-wide ban on power strips from being repealed (Electric transfer should be between one plug and one outlet!). It also did not help that the Department of Society for Public Morality opposes all kinds of protection in the belief that it leads to excessive plugging, which should occur only for the purposes of electrical transfer after an installation performed by a trained electrical engineer.
As the Society for Public Morality continues their doomed crusade against obscene circuitry practices, the Extension Cord Board will continue to review Audacity College's entire Extension Cord Code along with all related College Court decisions, going all the way back to a dispute over an overextended line shaft from 1879. For the record, the owner was at fault for the tragic accident involving his roommate's girlfriend's hair. All that can be said so far is that, despite rumors to the contrary, neither garlic nor crucifixes can be used on dorm room doors to keep RAs from searching the rooms.
if as this issue is cleared up.