After multiple sightings of massive plumes of smoke from miles away, the US Fire Division (USFD), a subdivision of the Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA), dispatched two dozen firefighting planes to douse Rockettopia in 100,000 liters of water in a desperate attempt to put out what they assumed to be an enormous raging fire. The plumes of smoke were six miles tall and visable from two states away, and appeared to be centered around public locations such as the town common, Audacity College, and University of Rockettopia's Redstone Green. The state government quickly ordered partial evacuations of multiple nearby towns after attempts to contact Rockettopia yielded only static and occational musings about how funny it is that, like, we have eyebrows. Like, what are eyebrows really for? Don't they look [giggle] silly?

As of press time, the firefighting planes have been completely ineffectial at stopping the billowing smoke. The USFD has reportedly requested that the military use its orbital water cannons to assist in the firefighting efforts, to which the military has responded by shifting uncomfortably and saying that they certainly don't know what the USFD is talking about. What would they be doing with orbital water cannons? That would be silly, hahaha!

We can only hope that tomorrow, Rockettopia emerges unscathed from what we assume by the smoke must be one of the largest fires in history.