Unfortunately, Rockettopia High School's trials of a $900 Marijuana Dowsing Rod failed when instead of pointing to lockers full of Marijuana, the consistently pointed towards skateboarders. As the teacher in charge of supervising the tests said, "The rod completely failed because we would be walking down the hallway, and a skateboarder walks by, and the rod refuses to point away from him. It was absurd.". The most impressive case of this was when the rod successfully located the guy responsible for the locker fire back in January from half way across the school.

"We did try to use the rod for something useful", the aforementioned teacher commented, "but when we tried strip-searching a skateboarder, it ended badly. Three teachers are still in the hospital suffering from mental trauma. Get well soon!"

The tests ended on Friday, both because the dowsing rod was completely ineffective and because it exploded when brought near a member of the Existential Club.