Trigger Warnings: Sexual Abuse. Because Fifty Shades of Grey.

The film Fifty Shades of Grey opened to massive crowds yesterday, giving hope to those in abusive relationships who strive for their love to be accepted. Fifty Shades is the story of Anastasia Steele, a virginal college student who meets billionaire Christian Grey. She falls in love with Grey, and he coerces her into engaging in his kinky torture sex fetishes. (I warned you about the trigger warnings) These include Wait, you actually highlighted this to read the details? Seek help now.. The Fifty Shades movie has, for the most part, received fairly positive reviews simply because the book set the bar so low. If the movie hadn't been better than the book, theaters would have refused to show it. However, some reviewers have manages to cut through the exceeding of their low expectations to remember that this movie is still terrible. Phrases like banal and degrading, "a dull, decorous affair, about as erotic as an ad for Pottery Barn","about as sexy as a root canal", and many more have been used to describe Fifty Shades. As an reviewer writes, "The fact that Fifty Shades is ostensibly about sex isn't what makes it bad, though: It's all the stuff in it that James' original un-original work that screenwriter Kelly Marcel (Saving Mr. Banks) didn't have the foresight, the energy or the authority to remove that makes it not merely bad but actively dangerous." The movie... Actually, just read the damn reviews yourself, weep, and come back when you're done - I don't have the space or patience to list the many, many things here that are truely fucked up.

Whatever its downsides, the movie has at least opened society's eyes to the plight of those in abusive relationships. Today, many women whose boyfriends hurt, abuse, and degrade them are routinely given help by their friends and family. "People need to understand that my boyfriend owns me - he enjoys making me cry and that's nobody's business but his.", an abused woman told us. "Our love may be different, but it doesn't mean that it's wrong that my boyfriend is turned on by my pain." The woman told us that she has high hopes that Fifty Shades will show people how touching and romantic abusive relationships can be, and how just because one member of a relationship controls every aspect of the other one's life.

Despite all this, the closed-minded anti-abusers at the Rockettopia High School Take Back the Night club are organizing a boycott of Fifty Shades. If they keep behaving like this, they might never find a man who will fulfill their dreams of enslavement.