America's vital strategic ally Slavonistan yesterday declared that their country is making a late entry into the campaign against the "Daesh", also known as the "Islamic State", "ISIS", "ISIL", "al-Psychopathy", the "Vaguely Islam-y State in the Middle East", and "KILL KILL KILL!!". Slavonistan is a vital American partner in a loosely-defined region somewhere between Germany and China. The Kurdish forces, local Sunni and Shiite militias, and American 'advisors' currently fighting ISIS will now enjoy the support of the legendary Slavonistani Turtle Riders, who left yesterday and are scheduled to arrive sometime within the next year. Speaking from his eight-room presidential palace in the Slavonistani capitol of Gorbachevgrad, Slavonistani president Viktor al-Stoyomstevski told the press that he would be "Honored to defend ze civilized vorld against ze barbarians calling zemselves ze 'Islamic State'. Ze Slavonistani elite turtle cavalry will break zese dogs like Croatians."
This news is especially exciting for Rockettopia, as we have long enjoyed a special relationship with Slavonistan. In 1992, only months after Slavonistan was formed, ambassadors from Gorbachevgrad and Rockettopia met and bonded over the shared experience of having accidentally acquired a large number of nuclear weapons. Gorbachevgrad and Rockettopia officially became sister cities in 1994, and we have been running exchange programs ever since. In 2004, to celebrate the tenth anniversary of our partnership, we sent Gorbachevgrad twenty kilos of high-grade marijuana, as they sent us a derelict Soviet tank and crates of Slavonistani swamp grass, which unfortunately did not get us high. The tank was repaired in 2010 by the RHS Engineering Club and has since watched menacingly over our disputed border with Raiderton.
The mayor of Rockettopia wished the Slavonistani Grand Army the best of luck fighting ISIS, and we at News from Rockettopia are proud to echo his sentiment. Go forth in the name of the goats!